April 3. My one year radioversary came and went last month and I couldn’t bring myself to write about it. If you know me, you know radio has been the best thing to ever happen to me – and I’ve had some pretty epic things happen to me.
Over the weekend, someone I love asked me how my show was going. It hit me: it’s been an entire month off air and no one noticed.
That’s testament to two things:
1) I have had no impact
2) Support can have many definitions
Before you think I too am in the sunken place, I’m not.
Here’s what I believe: Radio is transformative. A talented and skilled DJ can transform your day, your mindset, your entire life. It’s a gift to be able to do that. Some of it is pure talent, sure. And some of it can be taught. But if it’s yours, it’s yours.
There are people who don’t walk the red carpets who make transformative radio. There are people who don’t have a thousand live reads during their shows – people who will have only four links in one hour (and the rest is made up of songs and ads) – but their sheer presence can turn your day from bad to good.
Then support… I’ve had some incredible support from corners of this country where people know my name and I didn’t even think that would be possible. I’ve had friends whatsapp me to LOL about something I said on air and I didn’t even know they were listening.
I’ve also had people excitedly introduce me to others as the girl on the radio. I’ve had people tell me they’re proud of me yet they didn’t even know the name of my show. Shoot, I’ve had people mess up the station name but that doesn’t quell their enthusiasm about how someone (me!) who was an unlikely candidate made it.
It’s easy to feel sad that people aren’t actually listening. Not listening enough to know that it’s been a month since I left the ultimate second chance, anyway. But it’s incredibly unfair to do that. It IS support when people tweet or tell their mom you’re on radio even though they don’t listen to you. It IS support when people ask how things are going even though they don’t listen to you to know for sure. It IS support when people invite you to be a part of initiatives because they think you have a voice now even though they never listen to it.
And, man, I’m so grateful for all of that. I got to live my dream!
That part really shook me because I was expecting to relate. I was expecting to know for sure that I am an imposter and am this-close to being exposed. I was expecting a permission slip from him. But none of that came. Instead, I knew, even in the moment that he said it, that our paths were not the same.
It feels like I still have a future in radio. And if I’m wrong, I hope I am present enough to know and accept that. But for now, I’m satisfied with point number 2 and aim to work my butt off to overturn point number 1.